pensieve for your thoughts

2 reasons why Björk is a superior human being

6:41 PM

I have a serious lady crush on Björk.

I think I was about 12 when I heard my first Björk song. My singing teacher introduced me to some of the most powerful and unique female voices of all time including Nina Simone, Lauryn Hill, Katie Noonan, and Björk. While singing didn’t stick, the music did. I remember being somewhat confronted by her howling, unpredictable voice and frenetic electronic beats. I’d never heard anything like it. It was a little beyond my R&B obsessed, 12 year old taste however, so I filed it away for a few years.

I rediscovered Björk in my late teens when music became my escape, solace, and way of understanding myself. I was a reserved teenager with a tide of repressed emotion swelling beneath the surface. I never quite had the confidence or ability to express it. Voices of people I’d never met like Thom Yorke, Kele Okereke, and Björk seemed to sing my feelings in a way I couldn’t.

Now I’m in my 20s and the Icelandic songstress has been among a handful of artists that have stuck with me from girlhood to womanhood. Here are two reasons why Björk is my hero:

1. She’s a gutsy feminist.

In a recent interview with Pitchfork she spoke up about gender inequality. She talked about having to fight to get credit for her work and to have her ideas heard in a male dominated industry.

“Yeah, I didn’t want to talk about that kind of thing for 10 years, but then I thought, “You’re a coward if you don’t stand up. Not for you, but for women. Say something” … I want to support young girls who are in their 20s now and tell them: You’re not just imagining things. It’s tough. Everything that a guy says once, you have to say five times… After being the only girl in bands for 10 years, I learned—the hard way—that if I was going to get my ideas through, I was going to have to pretend that they—men—had the ideas. I became really good at this and I don’t even notice it myself.”

2. Her ability to express all my feels

I don’t know many artists who can convey raw, unpolished emotion the way Björk can. Her style of expression is uniquely her own, yet her portrayal of universal human experiences is so on point. When Björk’s latest album ‘Vulnicura’ came out, it couldn’t have been better timing.I’d just been figuratively kicked in the guts by a boy I really liked – I was confused and in pain and trying to move on, while constantly looking back over my shoulder, wishing things could go back to the way they were. Björk’s voice, the sweeping strings, subtle beats and synths expressed a vulnerability, pain, and fighting hope I could completely relate to. I spent many nights driving and singing loudly and off key to it. It was incredibly cathartic.

In the same interview, she expressed how difficult it was to make Vulnicura –

“When I did this album – it all just collapsed. I didn’t have anything. It was the most painful thing I ever experienced in my life”

I’m incredibly grateful she did it anyway.

To conclude this love letter, I just want to say thanks Björk, for creating beautiful music, empowering women, and making a 24 year old’s quarter life crisis less of a crisis and more of a growing experience.

In your own words,

“If I regret us, I’m denying my soul to grow. Don’t remove my pain. It is my chance to heal.” (‘Notget’, Vulnicura)

Music feature for Outta Gum.

music

EXPECTATIONS: When I was little I had a dream. I was going to move to England and live in Beatrix Potter’s house, write novels, and marry a dashing Englishman.

REALITY: Now I’m 23. Beatrix Potter’s house is a museum and kind of out of my price range, creative writing isn’t my thing, and the only Englishmen I fancy are characters in BBC period dramas.

I graduated from uni, went away for 18 months and now I’m back everyone seems to have life pretty much sorted. I on the other hand am still living at home and borrowing money from my parents to put credit on my Nokia brick. This was not how my life was supposed to go! I’m supposed to be a grown up; a sophisticated, independent, bill-paying grown up!

It’s easy to define yourself by your job, relationship status, or living situation. It’s easy to be super sensitive when people ask you how you spend your days, and convince them that your life consists of more than job applications and telly. It’s easy to wait for things that will make you ‘happy’. But do you know what? Just because your chocolate bar doesn’t have a golden ticket in it, doesn’t mean you should throw away perfectly good chocolate and feel sorry for yourself.

Expectations never quite match up to reality. Not that you shouldn’t plan and hope and dream, but there are some things you just don’t have control over. What I’m learning is that when the universe throws you these fun little challenges, be grateful for them. Life isn’t just the highlights on your Facebook page. It’s the in between bits too.

In the words of a very wise German man,
“We shouldn’t wait to be happy until we reach some future point, only to discover that happiness was already available—all the time! Life is not meant to be appreciated only in retrospect” (Dieter F. Uchtdorf).

While I don’t live in Beatrix Potter’s house, I got to live quite close to it and experience England in a way I never imagined I would. I still love to write and found a career path that lets me do it. While I work on getting that career started I’m taking the opportunity to smell the daisies, try new things, and help my family. And no, Mr. Darcy hasn’t ridden up on his steed and asked me for my hand yet but you’re never too old to dream, right?